The Burning Trinity of Bastard Hot Sauces
Emblazoned with fortune cookie-like advice, if Lucifer were to write it, the Burning Trinity of Bastard Hot Sauces dares you to buy it. Literally. “It’s Not Too Expensive, You’re Too Cheap” and “You’re Not Worthy” are two of the beckoning phrases inspired by Arrogant Bastard Ale from Stone Brewing Co. In the late 1990s Arrogant Bastard Ale found its place in the hearts of “aggressive” beer drinkers, not “the timid or weak”, and not long after, Carlsbad Gourmet approached the brewery to see if a collaboration could develop between the condiment makers and the brewers. Now available on both company’s websites is this infamous, infernal, incomparable selection of three hot sauces. Granted, most ingredients are identical among the three, but it’s the subtle differences that matter. Arrogant Bastard Ale Jalapeño Heat uses the (arguably) most recognized of Stone’s brews, plus a pepper that provides the common heat that most are accustomed to from jalapeños. Oaked Arrogant Bastard Ale Chipotle has the faintest hair of molasses and vanilla, since the beer is brewed with American oak chips. Chipotle is a smoked jalapeño, making this sauce richer in flavor and right about the same heat level as the Jalapeño Heat. Double Bastard Ale is one of August’s favorite Stone brews, but as Double Bastard Ale Double Burn Habanero, it’s all for Zach. This is surely the spiciest of the three sauces, but if you’re not distracted by the heat, you’ll enjoy the flavor. It’s only appropriate that the sauces designed to complement beer that holds no punches, would themselves be bold and baneful.